A Marriage Tribute

Today marks 24 years of life together, 21 years of marriage — and I can’t help but look back in awe of what God has done. It’s been, and still is, quite a ride! But that’s marriage. We’ve discovered it’s not just two people choosing each other, but two sinners depending on God and His redeeming work. It’s a covenant, a journey, a reflection of Christ’s love. It hasn’t been easy, but it has been exactly what it should be.

From the very beginning, God laid the blueprint for marriage in Genesis 2:24: “A man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” This isn’t just romance; it’s a spiritual union, sacred and enduring. Our marriage is a mirror of the covenant Christ makes with His people.

But the reality is this: marriage is also hard. As the article “10 Harsh Truths About Marriage” points out, every marriage will face unmet expectations, moments of disappointment, conflict, and personal sin. I get that—because even now we still hit bumps, and we always will. To survive—and to thrive—those trials have to be met with more than willpower. They have to be met with God’s grace and truth.

That’s where the Fruit of the Spirit comes in. Right now, I’m leaning hard on these fruits because I believe they are fundamentally important for how we live our lives. They aren’t separate traits but a whole—each one supporting and strengthening the others. The Crosswalk article “First Steps to an Enduring Marriage” reminds couples to let Galatians 5:22–23 be the measuring stick—taking it one fruit at a time.

Here’s a glimpse of how Scripture and the Spirit’s fruit have shaped our marriage:

• Love (1 Corinthians 13): Some seasons, love was just emotion. But God’s Word taught us that love is patient, kind, not self-seeking. We’ve had to choose love, even when it felt weak.
• Joy & Peace (Proverbs 17:22; Psalm 118:24; Romans 12:18): Even in storms, joy and peace have been disciplines. We’ve learned to celebrate the day God gives us—one at a time.
• Patience, Kindness, Goodness: In the irritating seasons, when our faults were loud, these fruits kept us leaning on each other instead of tearing one another down.
• Faithfulness, Gentleness, Self-control: There were doubts, temptations, and offenses. Faithfulness anchored us. Gentle words “turned away wrath” (Proverbs 15:1). Self-control kept us from deeper wounds.
• Healing in Trials (Hebrews 12:14; Galatians 6:9): Some seasons almost broke us. But Hebrews calls us to pursue peace and holiness, and Galatians urges us not to grow weary in doing good. Those verses held us together.

One of the biggest lessons? Each of us is responsible for our own fruit. I can’t make my husband gentler, and he can’t make me more patient—but we can each ask the Spirit to grow those traits in ourselves (Galatians 5:25). Some days we fail. But His mercies are new every morning.

Someone once told me, “Some people may only see Jesus in you.” That sticks with me. When we tend to our own spirit, we give God the space to work out the rest—in us and in our marriage.

To anyone reading this: marriage is not a fairy tale. It’s a testimony. It’s messy, beautiful, painful, hopeful—and yes, fun! I can honestly say I married my best friend. (My very annoying best friend, but my best friend still. 😉) Marriage demands sacrifice, confession, and relentless trust in God. But when His Spirit produces fruit, the harvest is always sweet.

Prayer

Lord, thank You for carrying us through it all. You know what we’ve seen and lived—the people, the places, the challenges, and the blessings—and You have been so good to us. Thank You for these 24 years together. You are an awesome God!

I ask You now: keep cultivating Your fruit in me, in my spouse, and in our home. Teach us patience when we’re irritable, love when we’re tired, and faithfulness when we feel weary. Give us self-control over our restless, worrying minds. May our marriage reflect Christ—not perfectly, but dependently. We give You, Lord, our marriage and this walk, with deep gratitude. For Your glory and our joy, Amen.

SK-

Woven in the Fabric

Marriage, like faith, is woven together day by day—thread by thread, choice by choice. It’s never seamless, but it’s strong because God is in the middle of it. My prayer is that J and my story encourages you to lean on Jesus in your own marriage or relationships. Let His Spirit cultivate the fruit in you, one day at a time.

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