Night in the mist of writers block and a mind full of chaos I let it all out.
Well this is going to be right to the point! I was sent a YouTube video from my son, Tristan of all people. It explained my brain perfectly. I cried when I watched it because I related to every word and it was so perfectly explained. I cried because obviously I'm not fooling anyone... this … Continue reading Explain Me
This is me most days... I have written 5 different blog post and failed to post any of them. This isn't like me at all. I just can't seem to feel good enough about any of them to publish them. I've started sharing some of my poems that I have kept to myself. This has … Continue reading My Life At The Moment Chapter 1
Mind Control It's been a battle for me all my life to stay in control of my mind and not allow it to take over my body. For the most part, I know what path I should take to stay healthy and emotional sound but so many times I allow my mind to over … Continue reading Mind Control
As I look through these old pictures, I see just how different the paths are that we all took. Though days we thought would last forever, have end and so much sooner than I wished. It's though happy times that I want to hold on to. Before it got mean and bitter. I don't want … Continue reading Taken
How to be happy when you're not a happy person? I have came to the realization that I can not be a happy person. I mean, I want to be but I am not. Everyone needs me to be happy, supportive and uplifting because that would make them more comfortable but I don't think that … Continue reading How To Be Happy
Santa Ana Wind https://www.google.org/publicalerts/alert?aid=127acaa8aa2b8d97&hl=en&gl=US&source=web https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Ana_winds I never realize what wind could do! I lived in North Dakota/ Minnesota before moving here. There were days the wind would howl at 60-70 mph for days and nothing really happened. Your hair would get messy, your front door decorations and all your flower pots would blow away but … Continue reading Hard To Breath #hillfire #santaanawinds
The Consequence of Not Trusting God https://www.youversion.com/the-bible-app/ http://www.brittanyrust.com/ You will have moments of weakness that test your faith and commitment. Because we are not perfect chances are you will give into the weakness a time or two. Your flesh will decide to take the path of least resistance and the world will be your guide. … Continue reading Oh My Soul
It was right there... How much I have taken for granted. I wanted to explore and see the world, to show my kids everything. To experience more than the boundaries that we knew. It all sounded so good. I wanted a place that I felt understood, a place that I fit in. The need … Continue reading There’s No Place Like Home
Saving my life one pill at a time I take medication to keep myself emotional and mental balanced. I'm not ashamed to say it. I know it's something that I need. This world can be a bit too much for a messy girl like me. God made me to be, empathic, emotional, convicted and loyal. … Continue reading My Medicine, My Faith
Feelings are messy little assholes! I am having a difficult time deciding if I should uploading my Vlog that I recored yesterday... because yesterday I was more emotional, messy and just a lot...a lot doesn't cover it. Today, I feel a bit better.... I'm different today and I don't why. I'm still a mess, that's … Continue reading Hi! My Name Is Contradiction
I seem to be having a rough go of it. I live in a place that is entirely foreign to me. I feel like nothing makes sense here. It almost feels wrong to be here at times. Pasting people as I walk through the neighborhood here, I feeling like an unwelcome visitor. Every single day … Continue reading Invisible Girl Living In An Alien World
It's been a minute since I've been able to Vlog at all! I decided to give it a very unprofessional go! It was a mess but hey, that's me! I've been a mental mess, a physical mess and an emotional mess...but still a faithful girl all the way! So wow okay! I don't … Continue reading Let’s Get Caught Up…
Being in totally recovery mode for as long as I have been gives you sufficient time to think...and think some more. Which truthfully has been a good thing (mostly). I have spent the last few months...8 months earlier or more trying not to think (too) deeply into things but you know me, … Continue reading Caught Up In My Head
At the doctors office for pre post-op. .......................................................................................................................................................................... I'm not sure what it is? Why I'm struggling to get my fingers moving again. I almost feel like I can't write or "go back to work" until my monsters...aka kids...go back to school. So much has happened. So much has changed and so much more … Continue reading Where’s My Writing Mojo?
It's been 6 days since my surgery and I have say that I feel surprisingly well! It's such a bummer, I can't leap over tall buildings, lift a car with my bear hands or even sweep my kitchen floor! In all seriousness, all my Endo pain is gone. I can move my hip … Continue reading What was I expecting?
These are just a few of the Bible verses and quotes I have been meditating on over the last few days, trying to keep my spirts up. Surgery count down is on...4 more days! Pre-Op appointment is tomorrow afternoon. “God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in … Continue reading Quotes & Verses
After receiving a few messages, asking me what's Endometriosis? I thought maybe I should write a post explaining. It's important to remember that I got these definition off the internet and Endometriosis, also known as Endo, affects every person differently. There are many people who have Endo right this minute and don't even know it … Continue reading What This Endo All About?
Well let me start by saying, I'm a damn mess! Pure and simple, I'm wrecked and if I didn't have the husband and amazing friend that I have, I don't know where I'd be! So thank you Jason and Katie...You guys are the Boom Diggity! Tuesday after I posted, Good … Continue reading My Pointless ER Trip
Warning: I just woke up and ... ya...sorry for my face. You're been warned! Every once in a while I get up before everyone else and I get to be totally alone. Well not totally alone and I didn't up get because I wanted to. I'm always with my sweet pup Ella, so I am … Continue reading Good Morning Party People