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Goodbyes Are The Hardest Part:

It’s not really goodbye, it’s more like see y’all soon! However, it doesn’t change the pain of leaving each other. This last year has been a tough one on all of us. We learned some lessons along the way, growing and becoming wiser than we ever wanted to ever be. We’re closer as a family unit in many ways but sadly divided in some ways as well. I can say for myself, I’m so much more self sufficient and capable than I was a year ago. However, I’m also less trusting of “all” people and I feel the need to keep my circle of trust very small. This could be why I feel a huge urge for “safety”. I have had an overwhelming feeling of danger for myself and my family. As if I’m personally under attack and my family as well. This has given me an over top feeling of anxiety! Now I have this immense need to be protected and to protect as well. These last few years but especially this last year has given me self diagnosed PTSD.  This is just more more the reason I’m so grateful for this next chapter in our life.

Our Last Day In Colorado

To begin our Christmas Day and last day in Colorado, we put flowers on my youngest sister’s grave. I don’t think I have ever written but once about my sister on my blog before and that’s in my testimonials.  (Here’s my Testimonial I’m coming…. ) Her name is Lauren Maureen Magruder and she is the twin of my sister, Jessica. It was very emotional for obvious reasons but also because everyone now has moved away. Jess is now left on her own to not only figure out life without her family just a drive away but it’s now her responsibility to put flowers on her sisters grave. It’s sad. It’s hard being alone. I know. But the truth is, she’s not alone. She has an amazing boyfriend. He loves her very much and his family has welcomed her and her children in with opened arms. Of course it’s most important to know Jesus walks with her and all of us each and every day. We’re never really alone.  We FaceTimed our parents, who spent Christmas in Texas this year as they are transitioning to Tennessee. It was very emotional for them as well. Their children… even now as adults, spread across the United States. Something I know my Dad never really wanted to happen. But I think my parents should be incredibly proud also. We all manage to do some incredible things. We’ve raised amazing children of our own, while enduring our own struggles. We’re strong women with soft hearts. We’re faithful to the Lord and rise above circumstances. I’m not saying it’s been easy at all for any of us but we do our best. I’m proud of us.

Christmas Day Dinner



Dinner was great! We enjoyed singing, prayers, playing games, wonderful conversation, great laughs and the best foods! I think we all came together beautifully! By now you all know who The Meg is… (my MIL) she came with her close family, friends and we spent this Christmas with my sister, Jessica’s boyfriend, Max’s family. It was perfect! All of us are going through many changes and I think we all got to enjoy some peace and laughter. It felt good and much needed. I’m thankful to Max for opening up his home and sharing his family with us. I have to add I’m extremely grateful for the love Max gives Jessica. Even with all the pain and abuse she’s suffered, he manages to make her smile. I’ve never, in my adult life seen my sister laugh like she has since she been with him. Laughter is such a beautiful gift.

One Last Stop…

It’s not our house anymore. It’s not our home base. One last stop at the place where I buried my childhood dog, where I learned how to drive and got my heart broken a million times. One last stop at where I had so many first times and many last times. One last stop where my heart was the fullest, where my son found his peace. One last stop where I grew up. One last Goodbye.


Now on to Topeka, KS…. -SK   The Traveler 🧳 On The Road| CHRISTmas In Colorado Open Letter| Dear Husband On The Road|Headed To Colorado And It Begins|Moving Week One

skelly

Hi✌🏼
I'm Skelly! I'm a beginner in the writing world. It's through observing and be a great listener that I translate all my experiences through writing. Sometimes it's journaling and other times it's through poetry.
I've been blessed with a passion for sharing the world around me through words.
Come interrupteur the world with me. It's so much better with company!

8 Replies to “On The Road|Saying Goodbye Is The Hardest Part”

  1. Living in California and everything you experienced out there is probably more than enough to feel on guard and have PTSD. I’m not going to tell you to let those feelings subside, but look forward to a new place and new experiences. Hopefully all better than where y’all came from.

    1. I agree with you. I’m doing my best to let the old fade away and past I can let go. I’ll keep the lessons close and stay humbled by all that the years have taught me. I’d be lying to you if I said I was free and clear of any worry of that ugly depression returning or having to fend for myself again all alone…uncared for…unprotected… those thoughts are in the back of my mind. I can only pray that that’s where they stay and one day I don’t have them at all.

      1. But you’re not all alone…uncared for…unprotected… Jesus is right there for you. The enemy is trying to keep you down and keep you holding on to a possibility of those feelings returning. Which they very much could if they stay with you and you keep dwelling on them. But you need to pray about all that daily and study your bible and ask God for His wisdom, knowledge and understanding to help you overcome these feelings.

      2. You blog has helped with this. I don’t have bible study or church obviously right now. My life is packed in boxes and in some moving truck right now. Much of my spiritual strength comes from yours blog and a few others as well. It’s so important and I’m so grateful for your faithfulness!

      3. I had no real direction when I started this blog. And I started noticing that I did an awful lot of reaching out. I just wanted people who would try to understand me. And I wanted people I would understand. I feel like I have a small pack of people and I feel like the Lord is taking over the blog and trying to help all of us realize some things we never knew before. He’s real, He desires us and truth is stranger than fiction.

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fabricthatmademe

My name is Skelly. I am a mother, a wife and unfinished project for life. Writing and researching has been part of my life since I could hold a pencil in my hand. Mental Health and Spiritual Wellness is a focus of mine, as I grow stronger in faith. Now, I hope to revisit storytelling, poetry and journal writing and the YouTube world possible to share and connect with all of you! Thanks for sharing in this life with me!

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