Where The Heck Have I been?

Everywhere But here…

and i will…

I’ve always been told that when you have a great project or something “big” that you’re working on, that you need to work on it privately, to let your success speak for itself!

Always be humble, productive, flexible, reasonable in your expectations, never give up, be forever grateful and networking is so important!

I have some exciting, new things in the works and that’s why I haven’t been as active here on this blog. I want so badly to share all that’s happening right now with everyone! I promise to share it all at some point, with my WP/ fabricthatmademe family as soon as I can!

Photo by Tayeb MEZAHDIA on Pexels.com

What I Can Share…

Maybe this is a bit of a teaser. Who doesn’t love a little guessing game?

First, I have been walking, crawling… this long crazy mazing to get my health in order for what feels like FOREVER. It’s all lead to this next massive leap! I’m nervous and scared to share it. I don’t know if I should keep this part to myself.

I thought long and hard about whether to share the next part of this unfair journey with my sweet, supportive, and dare I say… sometime judgmentally community, but I think it’s only fair. Most all of you have been with me through thick and thin! Through all of my lows and all of my highs. Now, I’m about to enter a whole new phase of life, why shouldn’t you get to walk that part of the journey with me too?

Sure I’m scare of comments, judgements, ignorance, and plain rude ass people. I’m super fearfully. I’m nervous I could fail in front of all of you. Even after all the work that’s got me here, to this super confident place, I could still fall flat on face and doing it very publicly is a scary feeling.

I’m terrified that people that don’t know the whole story, my whole journey, that don’t know me will come up with their own nasty conclusions…that they’d be so wrong in all they assume about me. And where would that leave me? Will these negative comments mess with my positive thinking? Will it cause depression in me? Will I take steps back in my mental health gains? I can’t have that!

I guess, if I do fail…that would suck big time. But I don’t believe that I will at all. I feel strong and am proud of my strength and where I am right now. Truly, failure is not an option for me!

It’s been 4 long miserable years in the making. And if you’re new here or one of those judgmental jerks…it was those 4 years…Actually, it was more like 15 years of stress, abuse, neglect, boundary crossing, along with seriously health risk that lead to all this… I’m far over due to take care of myself…so deal with it.

Does that sound defenses? Maybe it is. Maybe I am. Maybe if I just said what was going on, everyone would understand what the heck I’m talk about?

Let me say this. It’s been a long battle. A battle that I stay in, lbecause I love my family and my husband with all my being! But mentally and physicals it’s a hell of a struggle at times. It’s now been just over two years of strict counseling and life coaching to peel me of freaking walls! Before that I went to counseling to deal with other area of life from time to time…my in-laws, my marriages, my in-laws, working full time and raising a family alone, my in-laws, my health, my in-laws, my marriage, my work, the list goes on…

Over the last, close to 17 years Jason and I have been married, and over 20 years together, I have worked the entire time, and at some points had more than one job even, I’ve also been magically creating and having children too during this time. Only 3 of those years, while being relocated to a new state, one of those years was during Covid, I did not work outside the house. That doesn’t mean I did nothing…I still took care of my kids, my household, my family, life… Yet, comments were made from my husband’s family mostly, that I am a spoiled brat, or that my husband pays for everything, that it’s his money, basically I have little say in anything. There’s no mention about the part that I have done all by myself, the raising the kids, the running a household, the ware and tear on my mind and body, the family drama that his family put me and my family through… it was hell! I can promise you, this is not what a new bride thinks she’s getting herself into when she’s walking down the aisle! That doesn’t even cover all the family drama they handed us, and what should have been sweet, good moments in my life, that were stolen…Good Lordt!

I worked my ass off earning every certificate that I could in my teaching program, but no one said a single word to me about that, only reminding me how spoiled I was. But yet, they wonder why I am they way I am.

So there it is. Just a taste of why I am a bit hesitant to share the next chapter of my journey. The judgement is real! I think I could completely go off on the next unwarranted comment that I hear.

For those of you that do care and support me in a real and honest way, know that I see you and am so beyond thankful for each and everyone of you. This next stage has to do with my physicals health, and when I ready to I share this part of my life, I will blog it here. I have had to make many big changes already and they are only getting to be more dramatic and powerful. I’m excited about the future!

Second, business is key. This blog right here is my therapy. I know, there are some people who truly hate that I have created a platform to vent out my thoughts. They hate that I say whatever the hell I want, and whoever wants to, can read them! But this is where I let it out and feel better. I love this place! It’s fun and honest. I’ll never leave this place all the way ever. Sorry…not sorry.

However, I need a real place that does more than be a public therapy session. So without giving to much away, a new business calibration is in the making now. It’s actually up currently if you look for it. It’s anonymous and that’s a clue. It’ll be way more interactive, more spicy, funny, thought provoking, creepy, mind-blowing, entertaining, and 100% anonymous. Plus, the awesome part is everyone is welcome to join the party anytime!

This is something that I am so excited about! I’m new to this world, so when it’s 100% up and ready, I will let everyone know. For now the website is the best, I can do. I can give you the clues and maybe a few hints. Anonymous. Let your words be heard. That’s all I’m gonna rant about that!

Next, who doesn’t love this new Covid clothing trend? Sweats, tees, trucker hats? Coffee or tea mugs in hand at all times! Maybe it’s a wine tumbler …who knows! Either way, I’m in all day, everyday! But I would like to not look like I actually have Covid… So I’ll keep y’all posted on that new, exciting venture! That’s all can say about that one!

all day, everyday

Updates On fabricthatmademe

I truly have been writing my face off! Nothing is ready to published! However, this is the most I have been excited for a real series on my personal blog in a really long time.

First, I have been working on writing a story about my Grandma for a really long time. I rewrote the darn thing, like 6 times. I had to add new details, change some things, and totally rethink what my purpose was. My Grandma is a very unique, humorous person and her personality is something that I really wanted to capture in these stories, but also her perseverance. I seem to keep losing my way.

So I’m in the middle of yet another reworking. The series will be As My Grandma Members It. I will post several mini stories about her life and our funny conversations.

Second, I am also doing a series called Let Me Tell You A Story. These stories could be longer or shorter but always creepy, weird, strange and may or maybe be true. Get ready to be freaked out! This may or may not be connected to the Collaboration in the works. I’ll never tell.

I will come up with a posting schedule soon! Due to my health stuff above, most of new series, won’t really get publish until most likely, May. If things change, I’ll keep ya posted!

So Now You Know…

Well my fabric family, now you know the deal. I haven’t forgot about you or stopped reading your blogs. I am still every much here and still active. I just am going there a new season in life. It’s an exciting season and I am happy to share a little bit with all of you. I can’t wait until there’s more to say!

I want to also end this post with some more super happy news!

We have been living in temporary housing since 1/2/2021 in Texas. Which by the way, Texas is truly the most amazing place on earth, but if you are from California…. it’s closed.

I’ve never felt more at home! There are the most kind and humble people here in Texas!! I love it! I think it so beautiful and the weather is amazing!

Anyway, we close on our house 3/16/2021 and we will be home owners once more! Pool plans will be in the works that week! I am super excited! God is good!


10 thoughts on “Where The Heck Have I been?

    1. It is! But I feel like those people are very bias against me and only hear one side of a story. Also there is a lot of jealous sadly from some of these people. Some of those people have made some bad choices in their own life (which we all have at some point) but it’s hard for them to be truly happy, for not just my family, but me indvivially. People like to say they are happy for you, or wish the best for you, but sadly it’s rare that people truly mean it.

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