Hard To Breath #hillfire #santaanawinds

Santa Ana Wind



I never realize what wind could do! I lived in North Dakota/ Minnesota before moving here. There were days the wind would howl at 60-70 mph for days and nothing really happened. Your hair would get messy, your front door decorations and all your flower pots would blow away but no one ever got hurt, no damage was ever done.

Then I move here. Thousand Oaks, California and what seemed like a very small wind of 15 up to 30 mph set the whole damn state on fire 🔥



Well, I’m learning that these winds are very different. The wind here in CA is hot and it’s extremely dry here, so it doesn’t take much to set this place a blaze. I guess, the hot wind preheats the hills, mountains and all the vegetation, so before you know it we have a major fire on our hands. Que, mandatory evacuation orders…


The mid-west had its dry times as well but we had plenty of moisture compared to CA! It rained all the time and 8 months of snow! I miss the rain ☔️ so much. What I’d do for a little rain shower…for this state and for my mental state!

Mother Nature is a tough one but she’s also stunning! I’ve seen some amazing things from her! I also now seen somethings destroyed.


Change the vibe

The last two months have been… just like a dream and not a good one! There have been some good things, like we have a really great church and I’ve made some awesome friends that way! But it’s been difficult trying to make a life here.

The last month has been plain dreadful! With all the trouble we’ve had and no luck finding a house, we can now add Mother Nature to the list!

I don’t know how to change the flow. I’m starting to get desperate! I’ve super cleaned out this tiny apartments so many time, have our diffuser going with happy, Christmas 🎄 scents and I’m keeping my head in my bible!

This weekend, (once the evacuation was lifted) I got cookies dough and the kids and I made Christmas cookies, played Christmas music and watched all Christmas movies! I’m trying so hard to get into the holiday spirit here!




It’s hard to feel that holiday joy-fullness when it 80 degrees outside, everything’s on fire and you can’t breathe. Not to mention we don’t have any of our own things still. I can’t decorate with the kids…it just feel off. We all feel uncomfortable.

Living in a temporary housing situation is started to feel permanent. We hate it.

I just don’t know where to turn next! How do I make the plot change that we need so badly?

Breaking down

I’m making myself sick. I’ve been having heart palpitations for about 4 days now. They’re really bad and happening often, throughout the day and night now. There’s even times my chest will tighten up too! I wonder if this is just a panic attack or my anxiety kicking in or something worst? My stomach has started to give me trouble again for the last few weeks too! Health trouble is seriously the last thing any of us need!

I’ve gotta meditate or something! My life is to much for me, I think. I’ve never been good at handling tons of pressure but I’m on overload right now and my head’s going to pop off!

Praying for a home for my family. I can’t help but think about why God hasn’t lead to a place yet. There’s  got to be a reason.

Thank you     

I want to thank everyone who has sent me messages and prayers. Your messages are so sweet and uplifting to me. I appreciate them so much. 

xoxo sk

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Hi✌🏼 I'm SKellyLou. I have a love for sharing my thoughts and feeling through writing. Sometimes it's journaling other times it's through poetry. I love creating content and making YouTube Video that I find fun and fresh. It all new to me and I'm learning as I go! I document my families travels and all we get to explore and experience! I hope you will have a laugh and hang with me!